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jayce "yaoi hand proportions" talis ([personal profile] hexrot) wrote2024-12-27 01:42 pm
ar_cane: all icons by <user name=lylith_st> (Default)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-08 02:12 am (UTC)(link)
[ Jayce feels like a furnace beneath Viktor's hand, hot and strong and so capable of making him melt. He wonders absentmindedly if he feels his own body heat, if it bothers him when he's working at the forge, if that's why he works shirtless more often than not.

He's trying very hard to think about something other than a shirtless, sweaty Jayce. The conversation is an important one, if only because it's so private. Viktor dislikes talking about his disability as much as he dislikes talking about any other aspect of his body. As someone so focused on the mind and the pursuit of knowledge, of skill, the body was simply a tool—his own was a bit damaged. ]


Yes, I was born this way. [ He nods, then shrugs. His voice is neither sad nor deprecating, rather factual as always. ] It wasn't so bad when I was smaller, lighter, lower to the ground. Doctors have done what they can, but it's hard to work miracles on something that has always been broken.
ar_cane: (the pull of tension's empathy)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-08 02:56 am (UTC)(link)
[ The force of Jayce's words surprises him more than the words themselves. He knows, deep down, that a person does not need to be whole to be worth something—that isn't what kept him awake at night as a child, crying silently in bed because there was no purpose to making noise. No one was going to hear him and magically make his leg strong enough to run, to climb trees, to play sports, to swim. So he'd turned to mental pursuits, and it was perhaps a miracle that he had the talent for that instead.

Stopping them short, he turns to Jayce but keeps a hand on the crook of his arm, both for balance and because he finds the warmth so comforting. ]


Do you ever have dreams where you're still able to do all the things you did before? [ He feels guilty that he hadn't needed to ask about Jayce's leg, the injury that had robbed him of a stronger body. It's amazing he can do all he does now, his stamina far outweighing Viktor's. ] My mind cannot even conjure up the lie for me. All I have is one dream where I'm running along a dock at full speed for what feels like the first time, but this body doesn't know what ti feels like.

[ For a moment, he recalls that dream with shocking clarity, and for a second he could swear that his skin was purple. Strange that it would be one of the only dreams he has that's in color. ]

Ah, this is stupid. You've given me such a beautiful gift, and yet I'm sulking. [ He slips his hand from Jayce's arm and takes the cane as he pulls away, walking a little faster. ] Do you know, I can't even see what colors you chose? Tell me about them so I can imagine it.
ar_cane: (what is and what will be)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-08 03:42 am (UTC)(link)
[ Viktor is struggling against the cage of his own mind, wishing for once he didn't think so damn much but always falling back on it like a crutch. His brain was how he made sense of a world he didn't quite fit into, a cog slightly out of sync with all the others. Jayce felt like maybe he was spinning at the same pace, same timing, but Viktor thinks it would be cruel to ask him to slow down so they could try and slot together.

From a metaphysical distance much larger than the physical one actually between them, Viktor hears Jayce call his name and thinks of what could follow. He's heard his name on those pretty lips before, in conversations and dreams, but he's never sure what will come after them. Heat encircles his wrist and pulls him up short as it spreads through him like wildfire, making him shiver with the realization of how cold he had been a moment before.

Turning around, facing Jayce, he's struck by the oddity of the answer, both because he actually received it and because it sounded so unsure. ]


You think?
ar_cane: (my body is a sacred note)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-09 02:23 am (UTC)(link)
[ As soon as Jayce's hand is gone, Viktor misses the weight of it on his skin anchoring him in his body while his mind spins. He's still listening to the details as they are reluctantly shared, but it's a distant thing; his main focus becomes the research he's done on the topic. ]

Is this also a result of your accident?

[ If so, it would have fewer implications. For some reason. It makes sense in Viktor's head, because what is the likelihood that they would both be born with a total inability to see color? They were completely different in all other aspects, at least physically, yet had been immediately drawn together due to shared interests, intelligence, and now this? ]
ar_cane: (I'm looking forward to the day)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-10 01:03 am (UTC)(link)
[ Two revelations, one after another. In Viktor's opinion, it didn't matter who was to blame for the accident, it was still a tragedy. Unless Jayce had been abusing horses, which was very unlikely, there was no reason to deserve such an injury.

Viktor is more interested in their shared inability to see color, though. ]
Strange. [ He has an unfamiliar memory of a gear rotating through the air, smooth and golden on one side, colorfully rotted on the other. He's never seen such a thing in this life.

Stepping closer, he looks up into Jayce's eyes and squints. ]
Is it just greens, perhaps reds as well?
ar_cane: (because what guides creature only)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-10 01:58 am (UTC)(link)
The same.

[ It's impossible, the chances that they would bear this similarity is so statistically slim that it feels like it can't be a coincidence.

Running a hand through his hair, Viktor leans heavily against his cane, hip resting where his hand grips the handle. ]


Do you ever dream in color?

[ Clearing his throat, he waves his hand. He's getting ahead of himself and ] Here I am asking all these questions, and we're just standing in the grass. Would you like to return to the stables and sit? The brace is brilliant, by the way. I hardly feel it.

[ He slows his words, breathes in, and then smiles up at Jayce. Such a lovely gift deserves an unhurried thanks. ] Thank you, Jayce. It was incredibly kind of you to spend your free time and money making this for me.
ar_cane: (like a kid inside a cave)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-10 02:49 am (UTC)(link)
I thought you might have a girlfriend.

[ If Jayce could admit that he thought Viktor was afianced, then Viktor can at least admit to wondering if Jayce's nights were spent in romantic company.

The offer of the elbow brings a smile to his face, and he switches his cane over to his other hand so that he can wrap his left one around Jayce's arm. The cotton of his shirt was even warmer now after being out in the sun, and Viktor was struck with the desire to just lay down here and soak it up. Another time, maybe, perhaps even under different circumstances.

Nodding, he glances sidelong at Jayce. For some reason, he had expected to find yet another similarity in this, but they were still opposite sides even if they were of the same cog.

Coin. ]


Not always. The dreams are always quite fantastical, so I thought that perhaps my brain is inventing the colors it has never seen. [ He frowns. ] I'm not sure what it means if you do not have this similarity.
ar_cane: (and find a perilous ravine)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-10 04:07 am (UTC)(link)
Really?

[ He can't keep the surprise from his voice. Despite all the gossip he's heard secondhand, he can't believe that no one would be interested in Jayce Talis. Perhaps it's more due to Jayce himself, then, not finding anyone stimulating that he felt for romantically. Perhaps he needed to find someone with similar interests.

Smiling a little to himself, he looks up at the question. He hadn't really been paying attention, but if he thinks about it, maybe he is getting a little cold. When he had struck out towards the stables earlier, he had only worn a shirt and vest, forgoing a jacket as he often did when near the warmth of the forge. ]


A little. [ He tightens his grip on Jayce's arm. ] On my left side. [ Pointedly not the side that was close to Jayce and his warmth. ]
ar_cane: (sung between the flesh and hope)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-10 04:55 am (UTC)(link)
[ Viktor hums an answer, looking up at Jayce and raising an eyebrow. Is he back to flirting? Yes. There have been revelations and secrets and confessions, but... maybe that can be a little normal. ]

Lead the way, Jayce.
ar_cane: (carved within the beauty)

[personal profile] ar_cane 2025-01-10 06:13 am (UTC)(link)
[ Viktor misses Jayce's warmth immediately when he pulls away, and the fact that he disappears into a darkened room makes Viktor think, for a moment, that he won't be returning.

But then he does, with a jacket that looks well-worn in the coziest of ways. Jayce comes closer, then even closer into Viktor's personal space, and Viktor stands there to see what happens. For a second, he thinks... but then Jayce wraps the jacket around Viktor's shoulders and tucks it close to him. ]


Thank you, too. And... for being easy to share with.