[ riding his own euphoric high of seeing color (and worrying if viktor would misstep and fall), he overlooks his boundaries. he's holding viktor the way he'd imagine in daydream fantasies and finds the faraway responsibility urging: you should take a step back. but he's smiling too wide, too emotional to rationalize as quickly as he should for viktor's sake. the partner, his friend of months does not shy away from him, he swoops in closer. too close.
—viktor is kissing him.
jayce shortcircuts, completely still, his eyes wide and his pupils blowing up to the point that the hazel in them are nearly eclipsed. he doesn't— react. he's trying desperately to reboot and process from abruptly shutting down. he'd made plans, to take viktor out on this would-be-secretly-but-disguised-as-not-date in the prospect that he could court him away from the eyes stalking the property, in fear of talk beginning to surge poorly for viktor's end. he didn't think he was . . . even a possibility, for the other man. that he'd have to earn viktor's romantic interest through arduous effort.
and he kissed him.
now parted ways, jayce doesn't adjust much of his reaction. it's still very deer-in-headlights as he blinks rapidly and forces himself to think under duress. his heart is caught battering in his throat, in his chest. viktor is still looking at him, and jayce? jayce lacks a reciprocated action. it looks bad. ]
. . . Uhh, [ smooth, very smooth. rather than stepping away from him, jayce scrambles low to grab viktor's cane, and then his damn open notebook in equal haste. he leaves his pencil behind. wobbles back up, stiffly, returns viktor's cane, profusedly dark grey in the face— ] can we . . . Talk, inside? Tack room.
[ he feels like he's going to burst. every fiber of him wants to kiss viktor back. it takes all the willpower in him not to do that, out here in the open where ethan could see, or clarise or sarah or even margaret or anyone else can look through the windows of the mansion's scattered complexes to spy and begin their hurtful rumors until it falls on the ears of viktor's parents.
jayce beckons, rigid and anxious for them to take those few steps needed to get into the tack room. he'll wait. he'll wait right next to the doorway, anxiously tapping his fingers and leaving his notebook on his desk, in the meantime. do not kiss him.
no matter the guilt on viktor's face is going to stew, which jayce knows and avoids for strength. do not look. not yet. protect him, first. ]
no subject
—viktor is kissing him.
jayce shortcircuts, completely still, his eyes wide and his pupils blowing up to the point that the hazel in them are nearly eclipsed. he doesn't— react. he's trying desperately to reboot and process from abruptly shutting down. he'd made plans, to take viktor out on this would-be-secretly-but-disguised-as-not-date in the prospect that he could court him away from the eyes stalking the property, in fear of talk beginning to surge poorly for viktor's end. he didn't think he was . . . even a possibility, for the other man. that he'd have to earn viktor's romantic interest through arduous effort.
and he kissed him.
now parted ways, jayce doesn't adjust much of his reaction. it's still very deer-in-headlights as he blinks rapidly and forces himself to think under duress. his heart is caught battering in his throat, in his chest. viktor is still looking at him, and jayce? jayce lacks a reciprocated action. it looks bad. ]
. . . Uhh, [ smooth, very smooth. rather than stepping away from him, jayce scrambles low to grab viktor's cane, and then his damn open notebook in equal haste. he leaves his pencil behind. wobbles back up, stiffly, returns viktor's cane, profusedly dark grey in the face— ] can we . . . Talk, inside? Tack room.
[ he feels like he's going to burst. every fiber of him wants to kiss viktor back. it takes all the willpower in him not to do that, out here in the open where ethan could see, or clarise or sarah or even margaret or anyone else can look through the windows of the mansion's scattered complexes to spy and begin their hurtful rumors until it falls on the ears of viktor's parents.
jayce beckons, rigid and anxious for them to take those few steps needed to get into the tack room. he'll wait. he'll wait right next to the doorway, anxiously tapping his fingers and leaving his notebook on his desk, in the meantime. do not kiss him.
no matter the guilt on viktor's face is going to stew, which jayce knows and avoids for strength. do not look. not yet. protect him, first. ]